Food Blog

Five Guys, Sydney

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Isaac, Please update this as you have the chance since this is a FIVE GUYS. It’s more than Shake Shack, but God damn, consider this seriously as this is the President’s favorite restaurant for burgers, so please create something engaging, funny, and written in your trademark style that doesn’t look like you’ve taken a six-month absence from writing.

Five Guys Burgers and Fries is arguably the most adored of American hamburger chains. It has been steadily expanding its reach with its first Australian restaurant located in Penrith, and it now has a second in a hidden location (behind a McDonald’s, however) within Sydney’s CBD.

The entire gang is present, too, the classic white and red setting harking back to diners from the past with the delicious and slurping fries and shakes that are thicker than the one kid who didn’t get the concept of long division (I was the same child) and all the options for customization you might wish for.

One of the major differences that separate Five Guys and, say, fast food places can be found in the fact that all food is prepared to the order. They won’t even begin cooking fries until the order is placed, which means there’s some waiting time (before eating anything sure to increase the weight).

A delicious Five Guys Cheeseburger with nearly all the toppings (I chose mayonnaise lettuce, tomatoes, pickles, grilled onions, ketchup, mustard jalapenos, and relish).

When I last visited Five Guys, I was twenty years old. I had just walked into the restaurant that Seinfeld often filmed in and was looking for a burger afterward. I can remember feeling overwhelmed by choices when I walked into Five Guys (basically the opposite of the people I was dating)

A decade later, I’m better prepared than I was. I knew what my opponent was. I was aware of my options, and I was pretty certain I knew what I wanted.

It’s the Five Guys cheeseburger all the way (aka most of the toppings that are available and sauce combinations recommended) that is the most iconic American hamburger. A variety of different textures (gooey crispy, gooey, soft) as well as a few different flavor characteristics (salty-sweet, tart, and acidic),  all in perfect harmony.

I thought this was the ideal method to have Five Guys…until I tried The Grilled Cheese Burger

.Remember my previous paragraph on perfection in harmony, flavors, and flavor flavors, and melt the cheese more to add an extra dash of gooey delight and make sure to butter the buns before inverting them (the cleverness of this idea) and cut a few dollars off the total cost. You’ll have this hand-held device that is a masterpiece of technology.

This is the best way to go about having Five Guys. There’s a reason it’s now taking over TikTok (and not just because I’m always researching burger hacks like I’m looking for the significance of life).

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